Not surprisingly, those of us at Parent Co know a lot of (awesome) moms. For reasons that were not entirely unselfish, we asked a handful of them what they would consider the ultimate Mothers Day. You might think, given the opportunity to fantasize about anything under the sun, that the answers would be something only The Duchess of Cambridge could realistically expect. The truth is, most moms want something quite simple.
(Hear that, lovers of moms? SIMPLE. You can do this.)
Sarah, mom of 2 ages 9 and 13
Ok- dream? My kids are old enough that we have fun together, and we all work a lot, and any moment when we step outside of the pace and requirements of our day we just enjoy each others company- feeling lucky. So, my mothers day wish would be us all in the east village for one weekend, eating cannoli at Venieros and borscht at Veselka and long hours in the aisles of The Strand- happy.
A close second is a day in the garden with them and then walk to dinner at Leunigs and creemees at Burlington Bay. I dont ever wish for time apart. I just wish for time to be with them deeper. One little jewel of a day.
Elizabeth, mom of 1, age 2
I would like a Kitchen Aid mixer in the most basic color possible. Just kidding . I would like to sit in the sun and read my book uninterrupted and a gift card to Mirror Mirror or J Crew.
Nicci, mom of 2, ages 5 and 7
I want a morning of exploring in the woods with my guys, followed by coffees and downtown meandering as a family. Then, I want to go off by myself to an awesome yoga class while my boys work like a rock-star team to plan and make dinnersomething healthy and deliciousserved on a table thats set strategically with our brightest plates, coordinating (not necessarily matching) napkins and inexpensive flowers (too bad our peonies wont have bloomed yet).
I want drawings made especially for me and board games with sweetened mint tea. I want to do the bedtime reading and back-scratching and tucking inbut delegate the subsequent bedtime wrangling to my husband. So basically, nothing much (ha!) just a picture-perfect day.
Laura, mom of 2, ages 5 and 2
-To actually sleep in (not have the boys running in and out from 6am on and hear them yelling downstairs)
-To have the boys make breakfast AND clean it up
-To do something fun together AND then be granted a few hours of guilt-free time to myself (to hike Philo, get a pedicure, go to a movie, anything)
-And though I dont need anything, Ive always loved the idea of having something that my kids picked out (with a wee bit of guidance from their dad); Id love to wear something that they picked out for me, whether its earrings, a hat, you name it (again, within Dad guidelines)
Every year when M-Day rolls around I have the same conversation with many mom friends that theres a delicate balance of what makes a perfect mothers day. You want to spend time with the sweet people who made you a mom, you dont want to clean up after them for once, and youd love to have a nanosecond of time to yourself. And then come back to them. But not be the default for the day.
Sarah, mom of two, ages 4 and 7
I want to wake up refreshed from a full nights sleep (8 hours). The sun is peeking through the curtains and I have a kid tucked under each arm, but my back doesnt hurt. My husband is frying bacon in the kitchen. We lay around for a while (1 hour) and then have breakfast on the sun-warmed porch with really good coffee (1 hour). Then we go for a walk on the waterfront and the kids are lovely and dont fight and the sun is warm and glorious (2 hours).
Then we come home and my husband takes the kids somewhere for a really long time. I spent two hours drawing on the porch in the sun. Then I go for a long, leisurely run along the lake for and nothing hurts, not even my lungs or my illacal spinae migratis, and the music is really, really good (1 hour). Then I take a long hot shower (30 mins). Then I lie down with a really good book and fall asleep because hey, I just ran for an hour (2 hours). Then just when I start to miss the kids, they come home and climb all over me and make me laugh. But then they leave again. (30 minutes).
Then I konmari my entire house, top to bottom and say goodbye to clutter forever (4 hours). Then I take another shower, because dust and grime (30 mins). Then my husband takes me to Misery Loves Company for dinner (3 hours) etc (1 hour) and we fall asleep (2 hours). Then somehow the kids come home and theyve already been fed so we have movie night (Harry Potter, 2 hours). And then they brush their own damn teeth and we all tumble into bed (30 mins) and sleep a deep dreamless sleep. Except my husband, who has gone shopping and made both dinners and lunches for the week while doing all the laundry (3 hours). And somehow, magically, there is still time to get 8 hours of sleep before starting the week.
Erika, mom of 1, age 7
If we are talking pie-in-the-sky, then Id want to spend the day in NYC by myself looking at art all day and stuffing my face.
Or stay for a night at an inn on the beach where I can read and write all day and take long walks on the beach by myself.
But if we are talking realistic and simple, then breakfast in bed and a day to myself to read, write or explore sounds perfect too.
All I want from my kid is a handmade card and snuggles.
Kali, mom of 2 ages 3 months and 4
Number 1: Acknowledgement and appreciation. Its nice to feel as if the day-to-day things you do for your kid(s) arent going unnoticed. Having the whole family involved would be my ideal treat-whether its a day together, a special meal, or something homemade. (And since both my kids are under 4, they need all the help they can get from dad.)
Any of those things would provide a great memory to look back on, which is something I know Ill do in the not-too-distant future while muttering, where did the time go?
Sara, mom of 2, ages 3 and 9
Ill forever be enraged by the Mothers Day a few years when the sky was gray, and snow flurries flew like little flecks of spite. First of all, its May. Knock it off. Second, of all days, SERIOUSLY? In stark contrast, last year was glorious. The sun was shining, my husband and I spent the afternoon getting the yard and flower beds ready for summer.
My kids pattered about, entertaining themselves outside, and whether Ive blocked it out or it really didnt happen, I refereed no disputes. I remember lounging in the shade, watching the sky with each of them tucked under my arms and thinking, Nailed it!
So, basically that again. With morning baked goods, handmade cards that took longer to make than finding the markers, and something special to plant in the garden. (And a dessert that looks expensive.)
It is clear to me now, two kids and two different experiences later: our babies are born ready. All they need is for us to be ready to listen, and respond.
I had no idea how infuriating the question “how can I help?” would be when there was a sink full of bottles and an empty fridge. Mom friends to the rescue.
Beyond knowing how to handle a tantrum to avoid public embarrassment, we can begin to view them as a valuable opportunity to teach our children life skills.
ParentCo.
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