A growing number of moms across the country are packing their bags, kissing their partners and kids goodbye, and going on retreat. Mom-specific and women-only retreats held all over the world are on the rise and gaining popularity with the baby burping, diaper-bag-toting, and bottle-and-breastfeeding masses. While many sign up for these unique getaways looking for nothing more than a little downtime, most find they have gained a whole lot more by the time they return home.
Facilitators create mom retreats for a variety of reasons, but the desire to help women reconnect with themselves is a common thread among many. Shanti O’ Conner is the owner of Rooted & Open in Bend, Oregon and a co-founder of the Sacred Mothers Retreat held at Suttle Lake in Oregon. While working with women as a counselor, pranic healer, and reiki master, she noticed that for many, becoming a mom creates a loss of identity, which impacts their sense of joy and fulfillment. “I wanted to create a weekend where moms could have time and space to reconnect with themselves, their joys, and their passions,” says O’Conner, who is also a mother of two.
Kelsey J Patel is a LA-based spiritual empowerment leader and healer. She offers a variety of wellness retreats including a biannual women’s wellness retreat that takes place on the weekend after Mother’s Day and again in November. She says a large number of moms attend the retreat in May as a gift to themselves after showing up for their partners and children on Mother’s Day. She believes every mother should go on retreat once a year and says, “Getting away for a trip with the girlfriends is amazing, but every mom needs a weekend where she doesn’t need to show up for any other human being than herself.” Retreats vary in location, content, and length. Weekend and week-long getaways are common and many include yoga, journaling, group reiki and healing circles, meditation, and hikes.
Additionally, massage, acupuncture, aromatherapy, and cranial sacral specialists are often onsite to provide treatments for those in need. Attending a retreat means committing time to something other than the family – a difficult hurdle for most moms. But by and large, participants rave about the short and long-term benefits they have received from their experience and say their peers should take the leap and sign up too. The following are five reasons participants and facilitators say all moms should go on retreat.
Retreats offer participants who are feeling isolated and alone the chance to strengthen existing relationships and forge new connections. Jade Worthington signed up for the Sacred Mother’s Retreat for an opportunity to connect with her friends. “I knew at least six or so of my friends were going and that definitely sweetened the deal,” she says. “As much as I knew I needed some me time, I also felt I needed some time to strengthen and grow my friendships and my support group outside of my home.” Ashley Johnson also attended the Sacred Mother’s retreat, but without any friend in tow. While she recognizes that this would be difficult for many, she says, “Most retreats are structured to put everyone into various groups from the start…new friendships are forged nearly immediately and attendees feel connected and supported right away.” Johnson also notes that the lineup of activities offered at the majority of retreats rarely allow for awkward alone time. Ann Rivera, life coach and co-founder of the Sacred Mother’s Retreat, thinks a weekend of self-discovery in the woods while connecting with other women can be the healing combination for a mom looking to take care of herself. “An afternoon lunch with a friend…just doesn't really cut it,” she explains. “At a women's retreat…moms find the strength and inspiration to continue forward on their motherhood journey with a new support system, a stronger sense of self and a renewed excitement for life.”
A mother’s journey shifts and changes over the course of time. In the retreat environment, new moms often find mentors in older or more experienced peers. On the flip side, mothers and even grandmothers who are in attendance find purpose in their new leadership and support role. Patel says this dynamic occurs naturally in the retreat setting. She explains, “Older women are starting to question purpose and what they are going to do after their children leave the nest… and connect to how they are becoming a source of inspiration and leadership to other women. The younger moms get to bring that depth of fresh love to the experience.” Worthington admits that it was important for her to see and hear about the struggles other moms were experiencing. She says, “Some moms struggled with things similar to what I was dealing with, and some moms were dealing with feelings or events that…I could experience further along on my journey of motherhood.” The retreat left her with a new and renewed community of women she could turn to get the support she needs now and down the road.
Retreat attendees are often able to find relief from stressors and fears during and after the event. When moms spend time away from the family surrounded by women in nature, they have the space to find their truth and intuition – which are two of the most important guides in life according to O’Conner. She says, “I wanted to create a space where moms could connect to and release the immense amount of fear and judgment they hold around being a woman and mom.” Johnson was able to let go of one of her longtime anxieties while walking around Suttle Lake during one of the retreat activities. “I carried a rock representing my fears of the future, and at a certain point, I was able to walk out on a large log, throw that rock out into the lake and release my crippling fears,” says Johnson. “It was such an emotional moment that I lost my balance on the log and nearly splashed into the lake!” Since returning home, Johnson has replaced the worries that plagued her with a mantra she developed while away. “This life-changing moment only happened because I made myself a priority by attending this retreat.”
Annette Benedetti
Author